It’s almost Tisha B’Av. The day we fast and cry over the destruction of our Holy Temples. The day we mourn the countless tragedies that have befallen our people.

Our yetzer hara – our “human side” – dreads Tisha B’Av. If it were up to him, we’d spend the day in bed, counting down to the fast’s end.

Why? Because Tisha B’Av is uncomfortable. Forcing emotions we don’t feel is uncomfortable. Dwelling on horrible, depressing stories is uncomfortable. On Tisha B’Av, we don’t quite know what to do with ourselves. So – we don’t do anything. We shut down.

How can we make Tisha B’Av appeal to our emotional side?

Rav Yerucham Levovitz describes Tisha B’Av as a “mo’ed shel richuk,” a “holiday of distance.” What is a “moed?” A day that we spend connecting to Hashem. So… Tisha B’Av is the day we connect to Hashem by watching Him separate from us.

What?

Sometimes, you don’t know that you’re really close with someone until you fight. If your relationship is skin-deep, one disagreement can destroy it. But if you can explode at each other and stomp apart in fury, yet still seek each other out afterwards, you can rest assured that your relationship is real.

In a way, Tisha B’Av is the most comforting day of all. It’s the day that teaches us that our bond with Hashem is unbreakable. Because even on the day that He pulls away in anger, He invites us to come connect with Him.

Try telling that to your yetzer hara. He’ll feel more grounded. More secure. Like he can access meaning and connection on Tisha B’Av after all.