Sometimes, it’s the simplest things that stump the yetzer hara

Did you ever try using moral reasoning with a toddler?

Correction: Did you ever try using moral reasoning with a toddler more than once?

Most of us learn quickly that little kids won’t buy our lofty, ethical arguments. If we want them to cooperate, we need to speak their language.

The yetzer hara is pretty similar. Chazal describe him as a “k’sil” – a fool. Not because he isn’t smart – we’ve all experienced how cunning he can be when he wants to – but because he often uses a mask of foolishness as a weapon.

For the last few weeks, we’ve been referring to the yetzer tov as our intellect, and the yetzer hara as our “human” side, or our emotions. It’s our intellect’s job to pull our emotions after it by showing them the incredible value and joy in Torah and mitzvos.

Our intellect being – well, our intellect, he tries to go the intellectual route. He starts quoting sources, regaling our yetzer hara with divrei Torah and lofty arguments.

How does the yetzer hara best him? By sticking his thumb in his mouth and giving a blank stare. Or, by shrugging his shoulders and saying, “Sorry, this is waaaay too deep for me.”

We need to learn to speak the yetzer hara’s language – the language of simplicity.

The outside world might scoff at simplicity. Torah sages recognize, however, that simple is powerful. Simple things are relatable. They’re understandable. The simpler a concept or task, the easier it is to internalize or accomplish.

In his introduction to Mesilas Yesharim, the Ramchal tells us that his sefer isn’t trying to teach us new ideas. It’s simply here to remind us of what we already know. In his own writings, Rav Yisrael Salanter cites this quote, adding that he also plans to write only about simple, basic concepts.

Why? Both these men were towering talmidei chachamim. They could easily have dazzled us with brilliant, complex sefarim. Why did they choose instead to keep things simple?

Because these mussar giants weren’t out to make us smarter. They were out to make us better. To help us change and grow. They knew that lasting change can only really happen when the yetzer hara comes on board. So, they tailored their ideas to his style.

Lofty arguments don’t speak to the yetzer hara. He doesn’t care what holy sources they come from or how highbrow they sound. He needs to hear clear, straightforward ideas that make sense emotionally. He needs to be shown how simple and logical it is to follow Hashem.

When high-minded spirituality doesn’t seem to be working...

Yetzer hara: Oooh, have I got some juicy lashon hara for us to share! Get ready to have a good time!

You: But... Speaking lashon hara makes the mouth impure. Hashem won’t want to listen to our tefillos. Besides, don’t you remember that when we speak badly about someone else, all of our merits get transferred to them?

Yetzer hara: Um, do you understand what that stuff means? Of course not. But you do understand that saying this sharp line will feel really great right now. Just do it!

...try to get back to basic, relatable logic.

Yetzer hara: Oooh, have I got some juicy lashon hara for us to share! Get ready to have a good time!

You: But… if we say it, we’ll embarrass our friend and really cause him pain. Ouch!

Yetzer hara: Hm… yeah, I guess we won’t feel so good after all.

That’s Negotiation Tip #2: Speak the yetzer hara’s language – the language of simplicity. You might just find that the simplest ideas do the best job of stumping your yetzer hara.