Proactive chesed pulls us from our comfort zone. How do we stay strong?

“Who says?”

Proactive chesed. As spiri-preneurs, we’ve been making the shift from responding to people’s needs to enriching and bettering people’s lives.

It’s not a simple shift to make. That’s why, last week, we talked about breaking and reforming habits. About reprogramming ourselves by making it our business to do small acts of proactive chesed whenever we can.

But some of us hit a block here.

Who says they want my unsolicited gifts? When someone asks me for help, I know they want it. But if I just drop a gift in their lap – they might think I’m weird.

Should you really email that “friendly” to compliment him on how beautifully he spoke at that Sheva Brachos? He’s got a pretty prestigious reputation – who says he’s interested in a compliment from simple you?

Should you really mention that shidduch you thought of for your coworker’s sister? Your connection to her is so tenuous – what if she’s put off?

Should you really have that surprise pizza pie delivered to your friends’ house? Sure, they’re going through a hard time with their sick son, but who said they want you invading their personal lives like that?

Proactive chesed makes us vulnerable. We’d love to offer people a better life… but what if they don’t want it? What if they won’t appreciate our gesture?

Becoming an olam-chesed Jew means dealing with some uncomfortable feelings. Fear of rejection. Fear of discomfort. Fear of other people’s opinions. It’s definitely not a role for someone loathe to leave their comfort zone.

Unless they realize that they’re not really the ones putting their names on the line.

In Parshas Shemos, Hashem appeared to Moshe Rabbeinu and instructed him to stand up to Pharaoh and free the Jewish people.

To which Moshe responded: “Who am I to go to Pharaoh and take the Jewish people out of Mitzrayim?” (Shemos 3:11).

Moshe Rabbeinu was on a level of greatness we can’t fathom. When we speak of his “struggles,” we need to do so with utmost awe and respect.

At the same time, this story was recorded so we could learn from it. On some level, Moshe’s “struggle” reflects the challenge we face in becoming ‘olam-chesed’ Jews. It’s that same “Who, me? Who am I to go around making people’s lives better when they haven’t asked for my help?”

How did Hashem respond to Moshe? He didn’t say, “Moshe, you’re a great person. You’ll do a wonderful job.” Or, “Stop being insecure, you always have great ideas.”

No pep talks, no fluffy encouragement. Instead, He told Moshe, “I will be with you.” (Shemos 3:12.) According to Rashi, He meant, “This is not yours, but coming from Me.”

When we view our efforts, our chesed, as coming from ourselves, it’s easy to worry about results and impressions. When it’s all about us, the results – success or failure – define who we are.

But, as Hashem told Moshe, “This is not your mission. This is My mission, which I’m choosing you to carry out.”

If it’s our mission, our ego gets to kvetch. It gets to worry about self-respect and public opinion. But when we see ourselves simply as conduits to execute Hashem’s mission, we can relax.

Hashem didn’t ask us to get everything right ourselves. He gave us a task, and bid us to try. He’s the One who wants to create a world of chesed. He’s the one who asks us to follow “V’ata mechayeh es kulam,” constantly bringing life to others. He’s behind us. We’re just the delivery men.

And besides, who wouldn’t appreciate a free, fresh surprise pizza pie from someone who loves them?